A Brilliant Adaptation: How Dissociative Identity Disorder & the Power of the Therapeutic Bond Saved Me

Tell us about A Brilliant Adaptation. What are its major themes?

DID was a brilliant adaptation to the abuse of my childhood. It saved me. The therapeutic bond is what helped me make sense of what I couldn’t make sense of as a child — that the people hurting me were the same people I was hardwired to go to for help. As the memory barriers between my dissociated states dissolved, I slowly stopped living a dissociated life. Healing isn’t just possible. It’s how our minds work.

What line or passage from the book feels especially significant to you, and why?

There’s a moment I come back to. I asked Dr. Siegel, “What if I’m not strong enough to know it all?” He was quiet for a long time. Then he said the most profound thing anyone had ever said to me: “You’ve survived, Sally. You survived.” I hadn’t thought of it that way. I was scared, but I would be okay. I had already survived it.

What does healing mean to you?

Healing, for me, was making sense of my childhood so I could tell the story of it — remember it, know it all, and understand that it was my history, not my present. I was able to keep all the memory and meaning my dissociated states had protected for so long, without needing to live in dissociation anymore.

Why is it important for stories about lived experience with DID to be available?

I’ve yet to meet anyone whose DID resembled how pop culture portrays it. Stories like mine give people with DID — and the therapists working with them — a clearer, more realistic view of how it develops, and how open it is to healing.

How do you write about trauma without sensationalizing it?

I knew there would be difficult things to write. But I had to write honestly about what happened to me as a child, and how it led to DID. It’s difficult for many readers, I’m sure — but it’s what happened. Child abuse is hard to take in. I wanted people to understand the severity of it.

How does having/being a system impact your writing process?

I don’t know that I ever thought of it or experienced it as a system — for me, the states were verbs, actions, not entities. I was telling the story of how the states of my mind held what I couldn’t know as a child. Once I was safe and no longer dependent on that family, it unfolded. I could know it. The states were my memories, and that’s what unfolded.

What role do you think storytelling plays in healing?

It’s essential. Making sense of our stories is the whole point of the therapeutic process — sorting through memory, present experience, and imagining what’s still possible. My therapy was how I made sense of my story. It set me free.

What do you hope readers experience when they read your book?

That healing is possible. That trauma of any kind isn’t meant to be a life sentence.

What gives you hope?

Life and living offer me hope daily. Always.

What’s next for you?

A second book. Presenting with Dan at the Oxford Transform Trauma Conference in September. A few speaking invitations through next year.